Self Care Checklist
a nervous system friendly reset for real life
Self care is supposed to feel like relief. But most days, it starts as another thing to do.
It’s 2:11pm and you realize you haven’t had water since your first sip of coffee. Your forehead is tense and your eyes feel overworked from the day. Your phone has been buzzing like an anxious little insect. You’ve been “fine” all day, but fine is doing a lot of heavy lifting. And the strange part is, you’re not even falling apart. You’re functioning. You’re responding. You’re getting things done.
You just feel slightly away from yourself.
That’s what this self care checklist is for. Not a reinvention. Not a total rewrite. Just a return. A gentle check-in that helps you come back to your body, your home, your breath, your boundaries, and your actual life.
the pattern
Self care is easy to confuse with an aesthetic. The real thing begins inside you, and it’s built in small, steady moves. And most of us don’t need more ideas. We need a way to notice what’s missing before we hit the wall.
I think of self care like nervous system maintenance. Your body and mind are always cycling through information: deadlines, noise, relationships, non-verbal communication, sugar spikes, sleep debt, the emotional labour of being “the one holding everything together.” Eventually the system starts compensating. You become a little more irritable. A little more numb. A little more wired at night. A little less present in the moments you actually want to feel.
This isn’t a moral failure. It’s feedback.
So here’s the KOOMI way to approach a checklist: not as a strict routine, but as a set of tiny levers. Pull a few, and your day changes. Pull a few consistently, and your life gets quieter in the best way.
the koomi framework
Think of this as a menu, not a mandate. You are not meant to do everything. You’re meant to pick what your body is asking for.
Lower the friction.
It should be easy to start, even on a low-capacity day. Fewer steps, less thinking, more “I can do this in five minutes.” If it requires perfect conditions, it won’t survive real life.
Support regulation.
It should help your nervous system settle, not just your schedule. The point is to shift you from wired, numb, or braced into a calmer baseline through simple body cues: breath, warmth, movement, nourishment, reduced input.
Restore agency.
It should give you a sense of choice again. Not fix everything, but I can influence how I feel. A good checklist turns self care into small decisions you make on purpose, so you leave the moment feeling more like the author of your day than its task rabbit
the 5 pillars
Instead of treating self care like ten separate jobs, we’ll make it a five-part check in. Read the pillar titles slowly and notice where you feel a little ache, a little resistance, or a quiet yes. Pick one pillar and choose two small steps. That’s enough to shift your nervous system.
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This is your foundation. If it’s shaky, everything feels louder.
• Sleep 7–9 hours (or move closer to it)
• Eat balanced meals (protein + colour + fibre)
• Move your body (walk, dance, stretch, swim)
• Hydrate, ideally with minerals
• Book or attend routine health check-ups -
Clarity. Spaciousness. A brain that can exhale.
• Learn something new (hobby, a class, culture)
• Read or listen to ideas that expand you
• Create (write, paint, build, play music, rearrange and organize things)
• Set one meaningful personal goal and acknowledge a recent accomplishment
• Do a regular mental and emotional check-in: “How am I, really?
• Reduce distractions (limit screen time, no to task switching) -
This pillar is emotional honesty, without drama. Just truth.
• Prayer. Mindfulness. Meditation
• Express what’s real (journal, art, voice note, talk, poetry)
• Set one boundary that protects your peace
• Do something that brings you genuine joy
• Ask yourself: “What am I carrying that isn’t mine?” -
The part of you that wants meaning, belonging, and something bigger than survival.
• Practice what resonates (prayer, meditation, service)
• Spend time in nature
• Reconnect with your values and purpose
• Practice gratitude
• Engage in traditions that feel like home
• Celebrate your identity with intention -
The infrastructure of self care: money, work, structure, advocacy. The choices that make life less fragile.
• Set work boundaries (start/end times, capacity)
• Take breaks during the day, pace yourself
• Pursue growth (skills, mentorship, development)
• Advocate for your needs
• Track spending and make a simple budget
• Set one financial goal
• Get support if needed (resources, tools, guidance)
The “Today” Checklist
Now, a checklist for the day you’re actually having. Choose three. Keep it under 15 minutes.
Baseline Care
Water with minerals (or a pinch of salt)
Hydration is mood support. If you’re anxious, headachey, or foggy, start here.Eat something with protein + fibre
Not a “clean girl meal.” A stabilizing meal.Step outside for 10 minutes of daylight
Even if it’s grey.
Regulate Your Body
10 slow breaths, longer exhale than inhale
Make the exhale the priority. That’s your body’s “safe now” signal.Temperature check
Tea, shower, heating pad, cold face plunge.Move for 5 minutes
Not “work out.” Move.
Clear the Mental Clutter
Write the looping thought down
If it keeps repeating, it wants a container.Name what you’re actually feeling
Not “stressed.” Try: overstimulated, disappointed, pressure, loneliness, resentment, grief, desire.Choose the next right thing
One task. One email. One small decision.
Care for Your Space
Clear one surface
Nightstand, kitchen counter, bathroom sink. One is enough.Light + air
Open a window. Pull open the blinds. Let the room breathe.One “future me” favour
Refill your water. Prep your lunch. Put tomorrow’s outfit together.
Support Connection
Connect with one safe person
Not the person you have to explain yourself to.Ask for what you need, directly
“Can you handle dinner?” “Can you sit with me?” “Can we talk tomorrow?”Bound one thing
One no. One mute. One cancellation. One decision that protects you.
To Close
If you’re reading this and thinking, “I don’t even know where to start,”… start with water and one long exhale. Start with making one surface look like peace. Start small enough that your nervous system believes you.
And if you want a weekly rhythm that feels like calm you can keep, you’ll love Resonance, my Sunday note from KOOMI: a soft reset, an editorial read, and one grounding ritual to carry into the week.
Related Reading
Related reading: WHAT IS INTENTIONAL LIVING? LIVING ALONE